Let me tell you what happens...

When your mother has had a heart attack and comes to visit you in big bad London town.

You worry.

You worry a lot - quite irratioanlly perhaps. Condescendingly even.

But I am sat here at home and Ma was due back from Norwich an hour ago. And I'm worried.

I know all about the unreliability of the trains, she has my mobile, she is with Auntie L - who also has my number. But I am sat here - worried.

And she's probably down the road having a wine!