Just your every day interview

This is the situation, you are a 21 year old girl, interviewing for your first real corporate job. You’re nervous, it’s kind of showing, this makes you more nervous.

You are being interviewed by three people; the IT Operations Manager, Business Systems Manager and the Business Analyst. This is a touch over the top for a Systems Support/Training role you think. They start – literally. It is 15 minutes before you get to say a word.

They are laughing from time to time; they seem to be enjoying themselves. Finally – a question from the guy that talked first, “Why are you here?” A harsh opener, but you can’t argue with the relevance. You answer it fine, not great, but fine. (The boss guy is looking around the room and texting now).

Next the guy with glasses completely knee caps his boss mid-sentence and asks, “Is what you’ve heard so far in line with your expectations?” ‘All I’ve heard is three people banging on (largely to each other) – so I’m fucked if I know really’ you think to yourself. But you nod politely, say “yes” and look excited by it all.

This goes on for another half hour, the three suits having a competition as to who can work in the best fish joke when asking you about your last job on the fresh fish and meat counter. By now you’ve cottoned onto it and rather than answering, you are just teeing them up for their next one liner. They seem to like this.

Then, during one of your longer answers, the big boss’s phone rings. He checks who it is, the guy with glasses scowls with a ‘switch it off or get the fuck out look on his face’, the big boss doesn’t even notice. Instead he answers it, “It’s Juan - I have to take it, you guys talk amongst yourselves” - he then proceeds to crawl under the table and take the call in hushed tones! The other two carry on as though there is nothing unusual in this.

The interview carries on for another 45 minutes in much the same vain. Then they take you out for a wine – just so they can continue their gabfest it seems. Then, the madness ends and you and are on your way.

What you have just been through is an interview for a Systems Support role for the Business Systems Group.

Shit it was funny. I was stressed to hell and had pretty much lost the plot, Mark was on a role (a big role) and Kathryn was trying to be the sensible one (when the tears weren’t rolling down her cheeks) – and this girl completely rolled with it! She is technically fine, but no experience. But we decided that if she handles an experience like that, she can handle anything.

Offer is in the post. Cover note says, “go on, accept it. We dare ya!” She will.