This is all bad taste

K and I had a late one a work tonight and stopped in for a quick wine in Camden before heading home. This gave one of the local vagrants time to get a few under and accost us on the way out the door.

This was no bad thing - the guy was an old Irishman - and he was absolutely hilarious! He strolled up as quietly as you please and said, 'excuse me sir' and before I could say, 'nup', he was into his routine. We were rolling about the place within 30 seconds. And as subtely as you like he slipped in the odd 'I am raising funds for a burger this evening, you've been lovely, did you here the one....' This guy was quality and he didn't drop a line - he also got away with laughing at his own jokes in a way that I thought no one but Billy Connelly could (he was genuinely enjoying himself).

I can't remember many of his lines - but have plucked out a few:

A man walks into a Muslim lap dancing clubs, has a few drinks and shouts out - 'show us your face!'

George Best is gravely ill in hospital - his doctor comes up to him and says, 'George I have some good news and some bad news. The bad news is that you only have an hour to live, the good news is that it is happy hour'.

What did Gods text message to Osama Bin Ldaen say after the tsunami? 'Beat that ya f*&ker!'

Did you hear about the Scottish peadophile? He went up to some kids playing in the street and asked 'would you like to buy some sweets?'

And it just went on, damn he was funny. Luckily thanks to an email from Bridge I was able to fire one back at him:

So, I went to a Muslim kids birthday party the pther day.

Fastest game of pass the parcel I have ever seen.