Welcome to Kiwi Log - the musings of a displaced Kiwi experiencing the many delights of London, can't wait for the 'black snot'! I make no apologies to anyone that doesn't get the 'in jokes' - you should have gotten to know me better when you had the chance.

Friday, September 30, 2005

Empathy and every other bloody emotion

I am sitting here as hyper as four year old on half a dozen red bulls. Getting a power of work done with Talking Heads blocking the rest of the world out - for the most part anyway.

But I am also nervous, excited, apprehensive and any other emotion you care to think of. I am feeling them, and feeling it in spades. Why?

A very good friend of mine is about to resign and I am taking the ride with her. She is very excited about the new opportunity (as any sane person would be - I'll explain later), but understandably a bit wired up about having to tell her boss. So why am I so wound up sitting here?

Let's just say I have a vested interest...

Thursday, September 29, 2005

Things move quickly in the 'virtual' world - but what to fear of an earthly connection?

It appears that my initial plan to spin the 'girl blog'/'boy blog' thing for as long as 'humanly possible', [I am sure you mean 'editorially justifiable' - Ed] might have hit the online version of black ice (In a good way - I think...) . Girl has responded to my post on her blog:
"I have often thought that I would hate for anybody that I wanted to 'date' to read my blog.....as I think this blog is probably me at my best and also me at my worst and its certainly me at my most open."
I'm with you there, my blog was always intended for family - but seems to have found a wider audience. That said, I do try to avoid sanitising what I write, despite knowing that people I don't know from a bar of Dove are reading Kiwilog.

But to think that a 'stranger' (at least Girl was initially), that I might actually meet up with, has access to a great many of my thoughts of the last 5 months, that changes things. Moving on to Girls next thoughts:
"But - maybe thats not the case at all - maybe this blog would be a good veto - to see the kind of guy that could handle my personality - and my openness."
Well, you've said a lot more in emails - and I'm still in the game!

The last paragraph of her recent post was the one that got me:
"Point is - and there is a point --- right before I left for London a friend of mine from home sent me a link to a NZ guys blog that had just moved to London. Now - I do kind of know this guy (I am sure we have met - but thats about as vague as my memories are). Anyway - I started reading his blog almost daily. The more I read - the more I liked. Making a long story short (extremely short) - we have recently started talking about meeting.....and to be honest - I am quite excited about it.

More to follow......."
A couple of points.

When Girl said, 'The more I read - the more I liked' - I was duly concerned. Apart from showing that Girl is willing to entertain meeting someone that is capable of not just thinking, but publicly airing, the sorts of thoughts that have made up Kiwilog over the months intrigues me (as much as it scares me!). Not only that, anyone that is willing to fly in the face of customary written English standards and throw a hyphen in the middle of a simple sentence, is someone I think I could get on with - as almost all of my previous posts will demonstrate.

A final thought, and this is the clincher, is the statement; 'I am quite excited about it'. Queue - a like excitement - coupled with insecurity, doubt. What if I am not as attractive as Kiwilog (let's face it, despite conventional wisdom; the Green and Orange headers just work)? What if I am not 'likable' in person? It is much harder to proof read a real life conversation. Most frighteningly - what if we meet and don't get on? Now that could be great for you guys - an online cage fight - with no referee! He said this, she said that - I fear to think how far that could go...

So here I am, or more 'quaintly', her we all are. Not just me and Girl, but the lot of you. A few emails aside - you know as much as I do! Is that wrong or just a weird characteristic life in the 21st?

Who knows - but as Girl said, 'more to follow...'.

More indeed.

Seasons

I am definitely a 'minor seasons' kinda guy. This morning was perfect, clear and still, crisp not cold and should develop into a 18 degree kind of a day. Then chill down to 10 degrees to hunker down come bed time (and that's as close as you lot will get to 'pillow talk' until tonight!). From the comments and a few emails I have recieved, it appears that voyerism and living vicariously thrives in text form through a computer screen - which is kind of weird in itself.

Very busy day at work today, talking not doing. Short odds - it is going to be VERY frustrating.

But there is one thing that should happen today that I am very excited about. Chill your jets - it's work related.

Wednesday, September 28, 2005

People are strange, when their a stranger

OK, it took 4 months - but finally I have a boy meets girl story!!!

Well not quite... It is more of a girl meets blog, comments on blog, boy picks up link to girls blog, boy comments on girls blog, girl emails boy, boy replies and ...

It would take to long to do the story justice today - so there will be a decent update over the weekend. All I will say now is that it is a strange world this interweb!

So will boy meet girl? Will boy write about it? [um, has the horse not bolted? - Ed] Or will the safe house nature and slightly mystical allure of the interweb mean boy never meets girl?

Post thought - written in full knowledge that girl reads blog - boy assures girl that contact will be made before any more is said!

Tuesday, September 27, 2005

Well, excuse you!

At first I thought it was an isolated incident, but I have started noticing it more and more, and am finding it increasingly bizarre. 'It' being the seating ritual on the typical London bus. It starts with Passenger A getting onto the bus and sitting on the outer (aisle) seat of a vacant 2 bench seat.

I thought this unusual because I thought at some point down the line the person would have to move in to allow someone else to take a seat as the bus filled up - so why not take the inside seat directly? That would be far too easy.

As the bus starts to fill, the senseless seating show begins, and it is worth the price of the ticket on its own. Passenger A it sitting in the outer seat, Passenger B approaches. Nothing - Passenger A at this point in the dance is doing their utmost to pretend B doesn't exist.

B stands over A, expecting (or at least hoping) that they might move in and clear the outside seat. But this is England pal - think again. B is forced to speak, 'excuse me' - A looks up, by the look on A's face, you would suspect that B had asked A to perform some form of sexual activity on B!

Queue a look of righteous indignation that would do Peter Dunne proud, followed by the slightest movement of A's knees. B is forced to pressure past A - this time the look on A's face is that of someone who has just received an uninvited enema.

They really do like to make simple things difficult sometimes the Poms.

Mrs Peter Davis

It may seem like a cheap dig - but does anyone else ever wonder why Helen Clark is unfailingly referred to as Miss Helen Clark by media? An example from the Dom recently:
The Greens are committed to supporting Labour, but Miss Clark needs at least one other party to give her a majority on confidence votes in the new 122-member Parliament.
Why?

Monday, September 26, 2005

This time HE said it!

I must confess to having a bit of a panic over the weekend in terms of Mark (the boss) finding kiwilog, but I am a bit more chilled about things now. I lightened up considerably after this msn conversation with him (Mark being Doolster):
Doolster says:
"make it so, number one"
Doolster says:
sorry
Doolster says:
been watch star trek with the kids this weekend
Doolster says:
more trainspotter stuff for your blog
Frit says:
with the kids!?!?
Frit says:
that old chestnut
Doolster says:
'star trek generations' film
Doolster says:
fantastic stuff
Doolster says:
teh one with kirk as well as picard
Doolster says:
please tell me you're a trekkie?
Frit says:
I don't know how I feel about this!!!!!
Good to see we can all have a laugh, and that Mark isn't afraid to have a little chortle at his own expense! But for fear of an accidental career limiting maneuver - that is the last you will be hearing about the boss!

Not telling

The biggest thing that is going on at the moment is, for reasons outlined in recent posts, something I can't tell you about!

I invite you all to insert fingers in ears, shake head from side to side and go la la la la la la.

I will hopefully be able to share news tomorrow - Hudson types from home will have a bit of a chuckle...

Saturday, September 24, 2005

What does 'this' say about me?

I had a discussion with someone yesterday about what I blogged about, did I restrain myself when it came to the personal stuff, was I guarded - or did I just let fly? I suppose I sit somewhere in the middle really. I have never considered this an online diary in the Brigette Jones sense of the word - more a group email with a self selecting audience.

The irony being that this conversation was had on the same day that my boss, Mark, happened across kiwilog. Cue - panic!

It was funny actually - I think he and I were reading the same words at exactly the same time. The difference being that he was learning a lot about me - where as I was bolting through every post looking for anything that I didn't want known!

Then there was the messenger conversation with Mark that referred to a certain post headed "Trainspotter?", in which I publicly refer to my boss lining up at midnight to buy the latest Harry Potter book. Not ideal! Then the post on freezing in a presentation last week. Bugger.

Mark and I get on well (use the comments to clear this up if I have it wrong Mark - me knows you're watching ;-)!) - and overall - no harm done. He has also assured me that he respects the fact that there is a lot written here that I wouldn't want others at work to read. Not because any of it is mind blowingly personal, particularly revealing, or even interesting - but there is certainly more than I would tell people I work with over a beer.

Kiwilog also shows that I have emotions - a fact that 90% of the people at Hudson didn't get to know this until the speech at my leaving do after 7 years. I don't feel like losing that strategic advantage here after less than 7 months!

Anyways - I am still pondering the future of kiwilog - but I happily accept that if I 'put it out there' then it is there to be found, by anyone...

Friday, September 23, 2005

Pet hate

Most of the meetings I have to attend are scheduled for an hour - fine.

More often than not, 90% of what needs to be covered is dealt to within half an hour. What really pisses me off is when people decide the last 10% needs to be covered excruciatingly slowly, simply to use all of the allocated hour.

Aaaarrrgghhh!!!

Questions (and answers)

I received the following correspondence this morning:
Hey

I have two questions for you.....

Where does Frit come from? And how old are you?
I get the Frit question quite often - and people are quite happy to assume my age (and get it very wrong!) far too often. So I answer both questions publicly here:

Frit is the result of my first fling. My first girlfriend was completely unable to pronounce Christopher, the closest she got was Frit. And before people start thinking I resorted to dating people of dubious mental capacity - we were both 2 years old at the time. The name stuck around a lot longer than she did. We parted amicably after around 8 months from memory.

With family (and those close enough to be considered family), I am pretty much exclusively Frit - but it has never been picked up by others. Ever since school people tend to call me Hornsby, it has even started happening over here. At work Dad would answer the phone, "Afternoon, Hornsby". Workwise I find myself thinking - 'what would Dad do?' often, so whilst I will no presume to take up Dad's salutation just yet, if people want to call me by my surname - fine by me.

As for my age, ouch! I have often joked that I am not actually getting older - I am simply getting nearer to the age that people think I am. Popular opinion has had me at 33 for the last 3 or 4 years. At the moment, the average rude bastard is out by four years!

Wednesday, September 21, 2005

Bastards!!

One thing that has made being this far from home easier has been the World Wide Intery Web, and been able to keep up with events back home - not to mention, communicate with loved ones online etc. However, as much as I bitch and moan about the lefty media - reading The Herald, Stuff and a number of Blogs has provided a real sense of connectedness to everything I knew before.

Well all good things come to a commercial end, and now it appears that that connectedness will come at a price! This charming message from The Herald website:
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Brian Rudman: Delay can only be good for historic building

The six month ban on demolishing the historic Jean Batten Building in Shortland St will be reviewed on Friday by the board of the Historic Places Trust. Hopefully, despite the submissions of Australian owner Bank of New Zealand, the trustees will spring no surprises and will leave...



Published: Wednesday 21, September 2005 4:59.00 AM
Content Type: Comment
Words: 680
Mustering up all my calm and eloquence - all that I can come up with is - 'bastards!!'. With a capital 'ards!'. [capital 'ards' deliberatly in lower case; so as not to upset the more sensitive, online ear - Ed]

Further, I ponder the question: if the raving lunatic that is, Brian Rudman, is 'premuim content' - then what does that say about the rest of The Herald?!?!? Possibly what I have been saying all along...

Over it - officially over it

You would think that the idea of going to London, getting a good job, buying and taking over other businesses sounds like the bee knees. The dogs bollix even - but let me tell you - when your exotic travel itinerary takes in:
Staines
Luton
Uxbridge
Boston Manor
Dunstable (exactly)
Sussex
it's not!!

I do at least three of these places every bloody week and spend, at best, a day and a half at week at the Head Office in West Ken. Let's be polite and say that these places celebrate their Spartanism. Not to mention their geographical independence from Central London - NW3 in particular...

Today I was about to head from Staines (acquisition) to Boston Manor (payroll project) - was nearing the train stations and threw my toys. Threw them high and wide - all of them. And it felt good.

Then I rang in the conflicting appointment excuse and headed home directly. It's 3pm and I sitting here in a nice empty cot, lovely.

Tuesday, September 20, 2005

The best of an unpleasant reality

When I first moved to Auckland I became accustomed to taking on the odd dirty green (read - very amber) traffic light. What constantly amazed me was thinking I was being dodgy - and then checking the rear vision for the bill, only to find another three cars had gone through the lights after me.

I got the same feeling on the tube tonight. Massive delays on the Northern Line, crammed platforms, ansi people. Top way to finish the day that.

A tube finally arrived, people battled to get off, people battled harder to get on. I left my dash late (so I thought) and literally banged my way on at the last minute. Then, I swear, I felt like a hooker in an All Black pack. And when the shove goes on, there is no holding your ground.

I think I am getting used to London. Nowadays, I tend to sight something blonde, circa 3 feet away, shortly after the shove comes the 'involuntarily collision', swiftly followed by introduction, by way of the genuine apology.

It's about making every situation work for you really...

Post - the old fashioned type

I've just arrived home and checked the post, it is a nightly - vain hope - but what the hell - there might be at least a bill there - kind of a ritual.

Well, baste my Christmas puddings if there wasn't a wee parcel there for me from Mum! It wasn't until opening that I found a collection of largely left leaning cut outs from the papers back home re the Election (a suspect mother's 'cutting out'process may have been a touch selective!).

Anyways. Email is great, messenger is handy, Skype will be a winner - but Mands once said to me when she first moved over here that there is something altogether different about the written word, and she was right.

It was very cool to get something 'tangible' and 'authentic' from back home! Thanks Ma!

Early call and long shot!

Labour will not want to have to use one of their numbers in the 'nuetral' seat, and will need as many numbers from all the minors as possible. There is also the fresh memory of the Wilson experiment/debacle.

So - will uncle Eric's (Eric Roy) return find him in the Speakers chair???

Monday, September 19, 2005

So what now?

It is hard to know what to make of the Election result really - and to provide any meaningful analysis will take more time than I have to spare. So a few quick thoughts:
I am pleased Act survived - agree with them or not - they add quality to the debate. And the way Act survived was absolutely consistent with their ethos - good old fashioned hard work.

I am pleased for the Maori Party and I hope that they establish themselves as credible, and responsible, advocates for Maori. If they do, then that could be a good time to review the Maori seats.

National are back. With the extra seats comes the funding, the bigger research unit, the extra questions at question time, more media profile etc. Now they just need to get John Key some more media training (less smirking for starters) and start an orderly handover from the Don in a year or so.

Hone Harawira is a Member of Parliament - it is ironic that Dover Samuels is the man he beat - given that the entire nation are probably pissing themselves with nervous anticipation. In fairness - I would have said the same about Sue Bradford last time round and she has been very good. Surprise me Hone.

Labour are odds on to form the next Government - good luck! As I said before the Election - this could be a good one to lose. The Greens, Maori, Progressives and still needing Winston on confidence and supply - messy...

Peter Dunne proved that losing a truckload of MP's and having your share of the vote shattered is no reason to stop sounding haughty and supercilious. Git.

Helen, assuming she cobbles together some sort of Government, will take her place in NZ political history as the first Labour leader to win three terms. Fair play - she is a quality politician. [That wasn't easy for him - Ed]

The people of Tauranga have woken up.

The people of Wigram haven't.
It is easy to get dramatic about things such as Elections, but in the end, I am sure NZ will remain a great place to live (and the only place I want to bring up kids) - regardless of who is actually running the shop.

Hazy Monday's

I hate this feeling. The long long Monday after an indulgent weekend. Bad.

The weekend started with a good time catching up with most of the fam back home on Saturday morning as the results came through. The problem with talking to the fam is that I start to pine for the little'un's! I can't wait for December!!

In the meantime MJD and Nic are under strict instructions to get some pics over ASAP!!

Sunday, September 18, 2005

The big 'E'

Initial thoughts are mixed, well post more tomorrow. But one thing is certain, it's a bun fight now, and Winston is baking.

Damn.

The flipside

The one thing about supporting a team that habitually rips your guts out is that when they get it right, it is oh so satisfying. I have just made an absolute scene of myself down at NW1 (a bar in Camden) as Newcastle beat Blackburn 3 nil. Sir Shearer scored, little Mickey Owen got one and Charlie N'Zogbia took the piss scoring the third and I have been chuckling like an idiot for the last 2 hours! Is my life sad? Maybe. Is this feeling bliss? Absolutely.

It's the simple things...

Saturday, September 17, 2005

8.42pm NZ Time - best quote so far

Dr Sullen just got interviewed about results to date and he had the gaul to say:
"This is my 9th Election campaign and I have learned to be humble in victory and gracious in defeat...."
Well that would explain the "We won, you lost, eat that" line last time round.

Friday, September 16, 2005

Wicky wicky poll tallying wah!

I never thought I would praise TVNZ - but bless their cotten picking socks - they are streaming their live Election night coverage!!

For interested ex-pats - click here to watch the coverage.

I will be watching, and possibly blogging, as the results come in. Enjoy the night people.

An aside. I am certain that Mum and my relationship changed the day that we recognised that we both want the same things for all people - we just have differing views in the best way to deliver those outcomes. And that is the over riding theme of this Election - small vs big Govt.

I would love to be there with you Ma, but it sounds like you will be surrounded by a bunch of Tories in any case! Talk to you in a few hours.

The day before the morning to follow

I am sat at my desk having checked all the news from home, watched the latest edition of Cock Up at Sixes and Sevens (or 'Close Up at 7' in TVNZ speak), listened to the final interviews on NewsquawkZB, watched Winston saving offering to save the world (too funny for words) and all of you buggers back home are lying there asleep!

I feel exactly the same as I did on the Friday night after I had been selected for the St Georges First XI - for gods sake - can it just be game day please!!!

Alarm set for 7am, the Returning Officer should be in action by 8am my time. MJD (and anyone else for that matter) - make sure you have the laptop in the corner and msn running!

[A political and techo junkie - you are sounding sooo hot right now - Ed]

Thursday, September 15, 2005

Big day tomorrow!

OK people - I would never presume to encourage people to vote one way or the other, for a start that would be an insult to you, the democratic process - let alone an insult to predictability!

But for gods sake - please take the half hour required to vote - whatever your political persuasion.

There will be much to reflect on afterwards, I will be here on Sunday morning UK time to watch the results come in, all the while contributing vast sums to Vodaphone no doubt.

What I would like to see happen is patently obvious - but what I am desperate to avoid is a post election bun fight with Winston wearing the big white hat!

The Glasses Direct Experiment

Failure. I couldn't even see myself well enough to see how utterly average the frames looked.

Fight or Flight

I have just had one of 'those' experiences - and I didn't enjoy it.
The flight-or-fight response, also called the "acute stress response", was first described by Walter Cannon in the 1920s as a theory that animals react to threats with a general discharge of the sympathetic nervous system.
Well Mr Cannon - let me tell you something for free - there is nothing 'sympathetic' about my nervous system. And rather than being a pathetic nervous system, I am sat here lamenting the fact that mine is quite the opposite - the bastard thing works perfectly.

I have just presented a new escalation procedure to a group of 15 consultants, simple material, slumberous audience (and that's before I started), a one hour presentation. The plan was roll up - rock through it - should be fine. Nup.

I came as close to freezing as you can come without bombing completely. Just as I was been introduced, my stomach sank, deep. I have had this before - but this was as bad as ever. My usual response is to jump onto the whiteboard, quite literally to get the feet and body moving, then get the first 2 sentences out of the way – and I'm usually fine from there.

Not today - the shakes had kicked in and I could barely write. Then I remembered a conversation I had back home with a cousin of mine - the subject - fight or flight. Bingo.

So immediately I picked out the most painful user in the room and asked them for an issue that I could use as an example. As soon as she started talking I started getting wound up, she is a horrid drama queen / prima donna consultant. "This doesn't work", "no one understands my business", "IT don't get it" - the usual stuff. The rest of the room might as well have left - it was me and her - locked in.

I started to fly, the voice became measured and solid and I dissected every point she made one by one, working my presentation around it. That lasted about ten minutes and the rest of the presentation was fine. And that is what is so frustrating! I knew my material, could take any question, so why did I panic at the beginning?

I don't know. But I think I understand my (un)sympathetic nervous system a little better now - I hope like hell it helps next time!

Wednesday, September 14, 2005

A quick word on the Maori Seats

Personally, I do not support National's proposal to abolish the Maori seats if it forms the next Government. Not because I believe the Maori seats are necessary in an MMP environment, where party lists should ensure balanced representation. But because I believe they are part of New Zealand's current constitutional fabric (even though we don't actually have one) and should not be done away with at the whim of one political party. Nor should they be used as a cosy vote winner.

Further, two observations:

First - It won't happen! Even if National leads the next Government - they will drop this policy during the coalition negotiations. I suspect this was always the plan and could be a rare glimpse of strategic brilliance from the Nats. (Again I point out that I do not like that the Maori seats being used in this way - but it's not bad politics if this indeed was the plan).

Second - a little less hysteria please! One common argument I do disagree with is that doing away with the race based seats 'will disenfranchise Maori'. Maori will simply have the same voting rights as all New Zealanders. The proposal is to move from a rather patronising race based voting system to a non-racial one. One person, one vote, one democratic system for all. Simple.

That said, the decision to remove them should be part of a much needed constitutional review (one that goes further and looks a little deeper than changing the flag please) - not a policy plank for Electioneering purposes.

Oh my god!!!

If you had any doubt what this Election was about, Steve Maharey has just cleared it up for us all on the Labour website. Here is a quote from his newsletter:
"But then the National Party does not want any of these things. It wants a future where people make their own decisions about their own money."
You simply could not make this up! He actually said it. If you think I am kidding click here to go to the Labour website and see for yourself.

A redistributionist nanny state that makes beneficiaries out of ordinary hard working folk, or a place where working hard is rewarded? Spare me the cuts to public services and borrowing to fund it line as well - it is the same money we are talking about. The only difference is taking it and drip feeding it back (losing a truckload through the redistribution process) - or taking less in the first place. Simple.

Maharey has just exactingly defined the fact that Labour is dominated by academics; well meaning idealogues with no faith in the average New Zealander's ability to look after themselves.

Michael Savage had a vision of a society where there was a 'saftey net' that would support those that could not look after themselves. I support that completely - what decent person wouldn't. But don't you think things might have gone just a little too far in the past six years?

Tuesday, September 13, 2005

Busy busy

Payroll is still the work of the devil - so a touch frantic today. But I did get a few one liners snet to me by Mr Whitney that made me laugh out loud. Highlights:
I realised I was dyslexic when I went to a toga party dressed as a goat.
Marcus Brigstocke at the Assembly Rooms

I saw that show, 50 Things To Do Before You Die. I would have thought the obvious one was "Shout For Help".
Mark Watson, Rhod Gilbert at the Tron

I went out with an Irish Catholic. Very frustrating. You can take the Girl out of Cork...
Markus Birdman at the Pod Deco
Might throw some Election predictions up tonight.

Monday, September 12, 2005

No feral media - but weeping Wallabies will do just as well

The final Ashes Test is meandering towards a draw meaning that England will deservedly take The Ashes back from Australia. England winning also means that I miss out on the anticipated media mauling they would have received had they lost the final test.

Instead they look set to replace the 1966 World Cup English Football side when it comes to sporting hyperbole - not to mention replacing sliced bread as the greatest thing since, well, always.

Nevermind - I now get to watch another of my favourite things. An Australian captain repeating, 'be gracious, be gracious, be gracious' over and over in their minds before the losers speech. Not quite as much fun as media hawks over a bleeding English sporting corpse, but fun nonetheless. [This post smacks of a bitter and twisted NZ'er still smarting over 20 plus years without a rugby world cup, nasty man - Ed]

I'm a disgrace to the VRW conspiracy

You will need quicktime and broadband - but this is an absolute must see.

A 15 minute, merciless, mocking of the Bush Administration and their response to Hurricane Katrina. I know it is a marginal call to post a joke born out of such a horrific tragedy - but this is in no way taking the michael out of the victims - it is purely about the response.

Money quote, 'if you don't like the blame game it is usually because you're to blame.'

http://onegoodmove.org/1gm/1gmarchive/002364.html#002364 (you may need to cut and paste the link).

Disclaimer - like many on 'the right' - I am no fan of dubya or his coterie.

Kiwilog's first letter to the editor!!

In a fine display of editorial balance, the vast right wing blogging conspiracy happily publishes its first letter to the editor [that's me! - Ed]:
John Roughan's article " A vote in the interest of good race relations " struck an accord with me.
I agree with his concern that John Key's through political inexperience could blow budget & Helen's economic policy is marginally better.
His concern over race relations is valid if the National govt. got in. To undo 20yrs work of Maori initatives & not support there empowerment is not in the long term interest of all New Zealanders.
Thanks John for clarifying the real issues, I think I will give my party love to the Maori Party too.
Mother Kiwilog, Kohimaramara.
This was also sent to the Labour Gazette (aka Auckland Herald), but Mum, happy to publish here for a far more discerning audience.

Saturday, September 10, 2005

5 days to establish some discipline before M&K get back

Jack the cat has the potential to make me like cats in general. He is unbelievable, he is fantastically friendly, yet is still well staunch. But there is one thing that I have noticed from every cat/owner that I have come across that irks me. That is the pandering when it comes to meal time.

At home - Lola will take one sniff of the food offered and make her judgement, a good 30% of the time it is in the negative. Buzz will then bin the 'unworthy' offering and pop down to the shop to replace it with something more to madam's liking.

Not on my watch. They tell me that cats are instinctively 'snackers', so it seems simple, and here is how it is going to work for Jack. Food will be provided at all times, food will be there and it will stay there until a good percentage of it has gone. Then, but not before, will the bowl shall be replenished. Enjoy.

Friday, September 09, 2005

Pinko media

I know people must get bored hearing people on 'the right' complaining about the ''left leaning' media, if you are one of those people, best you stop reading now.

Over the last week even I have been absolutely stunned by the op ed pages of the Dom Post and The Herald. There is absolutely no attempt whatsoever to hide the fact that almost every single contributor is leaning so far left they have to make themselves temporarily vertical to get through a doorway.

Take this charming intro to a Dom Post editorial:
This election campaign gets weirder by the day, writes The Dominion Post in an editorial.

Apart from the ping-pong opinion polls, the prime minister sails on unfazed, National proves daily that it doesn't get MMP, and now, out of the woodwork, crawls Christianity's equivalent of the Taleban, backing a party led by a man whose vote ensured the Prostitution Reform Act was passed.
'the prime minister sails on unfazed' - for the love of god!! I know Helzilla sucks lemons for fun - but can you honestly describe her hissy fits during (and complaints after) the debates as the actions of ann unfazed woman?

Then there's the Labour Gazette's (aka NZ Herald's) pretense of editorial balance:
National spent much time trying to draw thin parallels with trade union support for the Labour Party. It had half a point. Wealthy unions do purport to be separate from Labour for Electoral Act purposes but use considerable sums of advertising in support of the policies of one party and against the other major contender.
'It had half a point' - for the love of Christchurch!! Half a point! A bunch of religious nutters distribute some pamphlets saying that National is the party that is most closly aligned to their particular moral position and value set - so what! Christ, there is documented evidence showing the PSA is actually working for Labour, by arranging for 600,000 letters to be sent out (and, unlike thhe Brethren folk, the PSA is hardly a voluntary organisation now that people on collective contracts are forced to join the bloody union). Lobby groups lobby for their own best interests - big deal.

To call this story a bit of a beat up is the equivalent of saying that Rodney King got tickled. There is NO STORY here. Yet this has been the lead story for days. Are there not more important things to be writing about?

And before anyone comes back and says that the real issue here is 'about Brash's credibility', and that that is why this is such a big issue - bog off. Brash was aware that the Brethren group supported National, yes. He knew they had a mail drop in mind, affirmative. When asked about a specific pamphlet that he had not seen - he said he did not know who was behind it. When he was told (2 days later) that the Brethren had distributed it, and did he know anything about it, he said he was aware that they had the intention to do it. Does that really speak to credibility? At least he didn't claim to have painted the damn thing (and then slap a signiture on it).

If the papers wanted to do an objective credibiltiy check between Labour annd National, I would be all for it, but I'm not holding my breath.

Thursday, September 08, 2005

Jerusalem - Dad - and spirit

I am firmly entrenched at Kathryn and Mark's. Good to be here - and pleased to be on my own to be honest. At the moment I am watching 'The Proms' on the BBC - and they are doing history and background of the hymn 'Jerusalem'.

It is strange the things that tip you off. Listening to Jerusalem being played at The Proms, something I always said to Dad that I wanted us to do together - but sadly never got the chance to, tips me off like you would not believe.

I'm sitting here, belting it out, like I did hundreds of times at school. Thank god I am alone - I must look a right sight!

But I am here, a kind of happy/sad. Thinking. Remembering. Crying and smiling.
And did those feet in ancient time
Walk upon England’s mountains green?
And was the Holy Lamb of God
On England’s pleasant pastures seen?
And did the Countenance Divine
Shine forth upon our clouded hills?
And was Jerusalem builded here
Among these dark satanic mills?

Bring me my bow of burning gold!
Bring me my arrows of desire!
Bring me my spear! O clouds, unfold!
Bring me my chariot of fire!
I will not cease from mental fight,
Nor shall my sword sleep in my hand,
Till we have built Jerusalem
In England’s green and pleasant land.

Back to the London womb

Mark and Kathryn are away for a week or so, so I am Jack sitting (cat) for a week back at the place where I landed on arrival. I'm looking forward to it actually - there are one or two things at their place that I don't have at home. Namely a microwave and Sky Sports!!

I have steadfastly avoided getting Sky Sports at home, it would lead to far too many 'internal weekends'! And Buzz is not at all keen on the idea of having a microwave in the flat (it's all rather 'earthy' at home). So I have been on the chicken salads and newspapers fairly well every night for the past month or so.

What to do with my 2 new found treats? Get fat. I intend to reach news levels of 'sedentary'. Microwave dinners, beers and football.

I anticipate 4 kg's within a week (before you say anything Jaco - that will only just send me over the 80).

The Ashes

The final Ashes test is about 15 minutes away and I have absolutely no idea which outcome I would prefer. The hype over here has been unbelievable, hyperbole abounds as the English Press declare this 'the Greatest Series Ever!'. The papers are absolutely full of player profiles, little tip bit's about Andrew Flintoff's outy (belly button) - it is absolutely crazy.

Which is why I am conflicted.

Usually I would have the British Passport out and be baying for Aussie blood. But the thought of watching the Brits, the press in particular, going from glorious anticipatory celebration - to slowly fearing the worst - to fearing the prospect of the unthinkable - to finally going completely feral and turning on their own - all in the space of 5 days - is quite a tempting prospect.

Wednesday, September 07, 2005

Flirting - I think

Having spent the vast majority of the last few weeks in the same office, I have found myself 'engaging' more with some of the crew here. They are mostly 20 or 30 somethings and are all nice - and it's nice to enjoy a degree of familiarity. But when (it's 'when' not 'if' - when I'm at work!) does that actually become flirting?

The defintion of flirting:
Flirt: Audio pronunciation of "flirting" ( P ) Pronunciation Key (flûrt)
v. flirt·ed, flirt·ing, flirts
v. intr.

1. To make playfully romantic or sexual overtures.
2. To deal playfully, triflingly, or superficially with: flirt with danger.
3. To move abruptly or jerkily.

v. tr.

1. To toss or flip suddenly.
2. To move quickly.
If that's the definition, then I fear that some asides and off hand comments may have slipped into the 'playfull' / 'overture' arena, but I am happy to confirm that there have been nothing jerky or abrupt to date!

Will keep you posted...

"Bugger the polls!" (J Bolger 1996)

I have always held the belief that political polls should be banned in the two weeks prior to an Election, I used to believe that the self fulfilling prophecy factor was too high.

I also have questions about polls in general. The one question never asked, and certainly never reported, is; ‘are you at home around 6.30pm on a week night and happy to answer questions about utter bollocks, before you twig to the fact that this is a political poll?’ You can check whatever you like about demographics of age and sex etc – but this is a self selecting sample of dubious value to my mind.

But the polls of late have been mad! 10 point swings both ways and just 10 days or so from voting day! If the polls have had any effects whatsoever on the undecided’s – I think that would be to make them floating undecided’s!

From today’s Herald:
The Labour Party has swept ahead of National in a new poll that also has the Greens as the third largest party in Parliament.

A 3 News TNS poll has Labour up six points to 45 per cent support -- nine points ahead of National which has slipped five points to 36 per cent.

Volatility in the polls is showing through as this poll contrasts with a One News-Colmar Brunton poll published three days ago that gave National an eight-point lead over Labour.

Tonight's poll also sees New Zealand First losing a point to sit on 5 per cent support with the Green Party gaining a point to capture 7 per cent of the vote.
What can we take from this? The answer is – sod all – apart from the fact that this Election will be the most contentious, acrimonious and remembered for a long time.

And because this Election is basically a personality free zone (the only personality – Winnie – could be ‘gone by scotch time’!), it has become a purely ideological and philosophical choice. That is a good thing, but as the polls show that there are a great many people that really don’t know where they stand and can be brought with a few last ditch promises. This is not such a good thing.

Tuesday, September 06, 2005

What am I missing??

Here in London the tubes on the main lines run, quite literally, every couple of minutes. Yet if a Londoner sees a tube at a platform, even if they 'sense one near' for that matter, they leg it. Head down, bolting, to catch the train as though it is the last flight to heaven.

They seem totally possessed by the need to make that particular tube. The real bugger is that I end up getting hit with women and children that are thrown backwards in the rush. It really does look most undignified and seems so unnecessary.

What am I missing??

Monday, September 05, 2005

High handed would be the polite term

Disclaimer - I don't like Helen Clark. I don't like her politics, I don't like her manner and what I really dislike is the arrogance. She is intelligent, I think she represents NZ reasonably well when she is on international duty. As a politician she is impressive. But I honestly think she has lost the tenuous grip that she had on reality. And it looks like it might just cost her.

I think this Election will have 2 defining moments, and Dr Don is responsible for neither. Not Orewa, not tax cuts. I think it is going to come down to Helen hanging her diplomatic protection squad lads and police out to dry in the motorcade case, and demanding an apology from an Air NZ Pilot (for what were misguided and stupid comments).

They might seem like trivial things, but I think they paint Helzilla in a very bad light. I don't think NZ'ers like the idea of having an all powerful President. Over the past couple of years Helen has given off the impression of a dictator - these two examples, this close to an election, have given people a stark reminder of this.

Anyone who consistently talks about themselves in the third person worries me [ahem, glass houses? - Ed]. A Prime Minister who says with a straight face, 'by definition I can not leak' terrifies me. Someone who declares that 'Governments role is whatever the Government defines it to be' disturbs me greatly.

The last One News poll showed the Nats comfortably in the lead. There's still two weeks to go - but if the result goes National's way - Helen will have sleepless nights thinking about those 2 decisions I am sure.

Sunday, September 04, 2005

Two Mil's - one of the Muliaina variety - the other is well cute!




This is Millie, my niece, leaving All Black training. She addressed the side just before they went on to beat the Ockers and nab the tri nations! It must have been a good team talk you gave them Mil's, nice work.

The glorious OE? Nup - just a temporary relocation.

General update time.

After the understandably overwhelming, nerve racking, disjointed and at times painfully insecure first month with Mark and Kathryn (without whom I could have been home within that month) - things, and I, have settled down. Quite literally.

I have been in the flat with Buzz for three months now and all is going swimmingly. Sharing my space, let alone, sharing various aspects of my life with a then stranger (stangers en masse was never an option), is a very daunting thing for me. I like people, but I like to like people in a controlled environment. More accurately, an environment that I control.

But the flat is going well and that little personality flaw [It's major - Ed] is not an issue here. It has been a major factor in me settling into London that I have a place, a nice place, to retreat to each night. I always said that I was not coming here to doss (sic?) on peoples floors and meet strangers to explore brave new worlds with. That doesn't, and to this point of my life hasn't, ever held any appeal. I came here to live life in London.

My idea of the London experiece, albeit it a rather staid one, is to do what I do, and like doing, but to do it here - and take advantage of what being here brings with it. Being able to go to landmarks, see St James' Park, West End shows and see Europe etc. To be honest - I haven't taken advantage of those things anywhere near as much as I would have liked to.

Since getting a job and moving into a position where I have the disposable income to do those things - I literally have not had the time or the headspace to do them. That will change I am sure. If nothing else, it leads me to think that I could be here for quite some time in order to knock off the list of 'must do's' before I head home for good. Despite the advantage of dual citizenship, NZ is still home and always will be. The prospect of my chillun growing up in isolation from their cousins is something I can't contemplate - let alone me leaving away from Mum and the rest of the family.

Mum's heart attack was the first and only time I have felt truly, hopelessly and desperately homesick. It wasn't a yearning for 'things of home' - but a indescribable yearning to be there. Sure there's things I miss, naturally, but there is an abundance of experiences to fill those voids. Over riding all of these emotions is the underlying appreciation that I am in a position choose to be here or to return home whenever suits me.

I don't actually know what brought this post on. It has been a 'trying' few weeks, a few weeks in which I have reverted back to type - needing to caveman, clear 50 emails on a Saturday before cracking a beer, knock over 100 and that Chinese takeaway is all mine guilt free!

To summarise a potentially incomprehensible stream of conciousness download - I suppose the message is that I miss home, I miss everyone from home - but equally - I am doing what I came here to do. That is, to live in London - no more, no less. Not the drama filled OE, or kodak moment packed adventure that many embark on - but a journey that is panning out as I had hoped. Learning plenty about myself, seeing surreal things in 'others', and living - in London.

Thursday, September 01, 2005

Blogging and business don't mix

I have just finished a good post on how similar my current role is to my role back home, it quoted a press release from 1999 when my previous employer was acquired, and a quote from today's press release confirming that my current employer had just been acquired.

I swear to god - the press releases are almost identical. Not far off word for word (in fact I suspect a degree of plagarism). From a work perspective it is honestly funny - you Hudson folk will know what I am talking about. The internal announcement was 'business as usual...' - my first meeting was preparing for the inevietable (read - the exact opposite to business as usual).

I was having a quick look over the post and thought about the commercial sensitivity - so I got clever and replaced the names with Company A said Company B etc... and then read it again. After some further reflection I came to the conclusion that it was still too risky - should someone stumble across it - not good! Damn shame, because (IMHO) I thought the post itself was ;-). Purely for the ludicrousy of the deja voo factor.

But it is an interesting area - to what extent can I express my views? When it relates to my employer? What right do I have to mention others and / or personal relationships and circumstances here? This is something that confronts me fairly regularly, spice up the blog - but at what potential cost?

Sorry folks, I'm tending towards the safety first blog approach at this stage. I'll have to email you individually with details about the celeb I hooked up with last weekend.

Annoying, very annoying

I've had a while with the new flash phonic takes photos and videos real time conversations scratches your back sends your mother in law directly to voice mail sony ericsson. Fair to say it is 'feature rich' - and the true geek would have figured out how to make the thing walk their dog for them by now.

But what is annoying as hell is that it is an average telephone! By that, I mean it is not particularly easy to find a name, pless play and then actually hear the person on the other end. When I buy a phone - I want something that does what Alexander Graham had in mind, as does it well. Anything else - bonus.

Fancy gadgets that fail in there primary purpose are soooo frustrating! You don't buy a fridge that plays CD's, but only goes down to 'Tepid'. Salesgeek got me good, lesson learned.